The Power of Love and Hate
by Thetiesthatbindus
Summary: Soma was more affected by Erina's lack of trust in him during BLUE. This leads to a more memorable final, where feelings are revealed, methods are changed, and love may begin to take hold. Featuring characters that are slightly OOC.
1. The Confrontation

A/N I own none of the places, characters, or terms expressed in this story.

Hey everyone! My name is Livo147 and I'm trying my hand at Shokugeki no Soma fanfiction. Normally you'd find me under a different penname over at the Harry Potter and Chuck fanfiction archives, I will leave my other account in my bio, if you guys want to check it out. This fanfiction will be canon compliant until chapter 310 of the manga and it will feature an alternate ending to the Soma vs. Asahi match. No need to hold your breaths—Soma will definitely win the match. This project was based off a major pet peeve that I have with the manga. The pet peeve is that Soma seems to have no backbone when it comes to Erina and how she acts. Soma just seems to let Erina ridicule and belittle him without any repercussions to herself. In this fanfiction, I'm trying to change that. Soma is going to be mad and he is going to be sad. It is going to lead to some angsty situations. And hopefully through these emotions, Erina will learn of her own feelings towards Soma. I understand that not everyone will like this fanfiction—even though I'd like them to—but try not to flame me or anyone. Any real criticisms will be welcomed (even encouraged) and I will try my best to implement your remedies. And lastly, this will be **Sorina.**

Hope you guys enjoy the story!

-Livo147

Soma's brows were perspiring as he waited for the long-awaited result of the Shokugeki between Asahi Saiba and himself. Truth be told Soma doubted his chances, he did not have access to the same broken superpowers that Asahi Saiba had nor did he have the age or experience over Asahi Saiba. But what Soma did have was the passion and the drive that would push him through the metaphorical mud and thus lead him to victory. If Soma won BLUE, it would be due to his belief in never giving up and never surrendering. After all, he was just a diner brat in a gourmet world. He was not _supposed _to be here.

Soma then took some time to take in the ambiance of the venue around him. First, he looked directly ahead at Mana Nakiri's face. Her face had morphed back into stone, like it was before she tasted his dish. Her face held no trace of the bliss that she succumbed to just a moment before.

And if Soma won, it would be a shocking upset over the prohibitive favorite. People seem to forget that Soma _is _the first seat of Totsuki Academy which means that he must have _some _talent. Right?

And that is not even the worst part about BLUE. The worst part is that BLUE is supposed to be Asahi's breakout party, and everybody was expecting it to happen. Everybody was up Asahi's ass trying to please him, hell, they even anointed him the "Second coming of Saiba." But it seemed as though Soma would have the opportunity to cut it short. And Soma would be happy to.

Soma then looked to his "brother," Asahi and what he saw surprised him, for on Asahi's face was a look of pure terror. This face contrasted with Asahi's normally coy and confident demeanor. Instead of his normal face, his face looked like a man who saw the end of his life in front of him and could do nothing about it. Soma saw the gradual dimming of his eyes from vibrant color to eyes that looked dead and glazed. The defeat of his cooking would be the symbolic death of his soul and his purpose in life.

Poetic Justice, really.

Because even if by the grace of some god, Asahi won, Soma would not congratulate him or even acknowledge his victory. People would call him a sore loser, but he did not care. Soma had no respect for Asahi or what he stood for—kidnapping and forced marriages. Also, Asahi's cooking was not his own, it was a hodgepodge of styles that he took from chefs better than himself. In all, Asahi was nothing more than a thief.

When Soma looked straight into the eyes of his true adversary, he noticed that Saiba looked deep in thought. His eyes turned from the glazed, dead look to eyes that looked darker than black holes. They looked like the eyes of a man who was being tempted to jump off the precipice of sanity.

Soma felt morbidly satisfied.

* * *

Meanwhile in Asahi Saiba's head:

Asahi Saiba was not happy, not happy at all. After taking a bite of Yukihara Soma's dish he knew he lost. And truth be told, he was not used to losing. The feeling of loss was at first, bitter, and then oddly satisfying, like a weight was lifted off his shoulders.

When he first saw Soma's dish he was not impressed because he could not smell any fragrance. However, after taking a good look at the dish he had to admit that it looked intoxicating. There was only one word to describe it—art. Like a painter's _magnus opus, _when a person looked at it, they were entranced and could not stop looking.

His hands seemed to move by themselves and then he took a bite. And it was like an EXPLOSION! Colors sprouted out from everywhere, colors he had never seen before—colors that should had never existed! The flavor profile that the dish had was something that he never felt from his food. Asahi knew his food was "good", but this dish made his dish seem _bland. _His dish was superficial like a pretty girl with no personality while Soma's was a pretty girl who was also a great person. His dishes had no personality, behind the veneer of bliss there was a hollow dish. And then he was pulled into the biggest foodgasm of his life.

'_He was transported to a plain field marred with mountains and dead armies. The only people alive were himself and a SMALL Soma? Soma was armed with a slingshot that held a pellet of his dish. Instinctively, Asahi then looked at himself and he noticed that Soma wasn't small but that he was at least twenty feet tall! And then out of nowhere Soma shot his slingshot at him. The force of the dish brought Asahi to his knees, he was gasping and entering pure ecstasy. The flavors bombarded his body, the five cuisines melding together to form what could only be described as, Ambrosia, the food of the gods. It was like he was trapped in a cocoon not being able to stop eating as his body turned against him. The flavors ravaged him in a flurry of attacks and his fortitude was starting to wane. Eventually, he had no choice but to say, "delicious."'_

Asahi at that moment, at the apex of bliss, had an epiphany. His dish paled in comparison to Yukihara's, not even his "cross knives" ability was able to surpass this dish. And now he knew that Soma Yukihara was truly Saiba's son!

Asahi was pulled out of his thoughts by the harbinger of his nightmare. The Judges had announced the victor. The words were, "And the winner of the Shokugeki is Soma Yukihara-."

His eyes then instantly darted to the scoreboards, they read: 3-0, 3-0, and 3-0. These words flashed before his eyes like a song stuck on repeat. These were the numbers that he was sure would haunt his dreams for the foreseeable future. He looked at his hands, the hands that failed him. And the he looked at the knife of Joichiro, the knife of the only father he had ever known. And secondly, the greatest chef in his eyes.

The full truth dawned on him, he failed. His goal to be the best chef in the world ended and he could never cook again. He had played with fire—quite literally—and got burned. His confidence was shot, and he felt like the cowardly lion. The very vessel that saved him from the horrors of his childhood had turned its back on him.

And then, how could he face the disappointed people, the people that thought he couldn't lose? He couldn't face them. He let them down. The embarrassment he felt was palpable. Asahi Saiba knew what he had to do.

He stood up, proud, and walked towards the exit of the auditorium. He did not spare a passing glance at anybody—not even his Noir Chefs.

Some say that they saw a glimpse of a smile on his face, but that was never proven. The last glimpse anybody had of Asahi-Saiba was of him leaving the building. First, out of the doorway and then out of people's lives forever.

* * *

"_And the winner of the Shokugeki is Soma Yukihara; he will be moving on to the final round of BLUE where he will be facing Erina Nakiri!"_

Soma was pulled from his thoughts when the announcer started to proclaim that he won over Asahi. After Soma was declared victor, his hands started convulsing at a steady rate, that was the only sign that he was any different from his usual, brash self. There were bright lights everywhere flickering in untraceable patterns that seemed to work on their own. The lights seemed like constellations that populate the night sky. Only after Soma's body became adjusted to these lights did Soma realize that they were actually cameras taking photos of him. The photographers were obviously trying to get a good photo of the new favorite to win the tournament. It is annoying to Soma how these people can act all chummy with him after they slandered him throughout the tournament. Coming from the small shopping district of Sumiredōri, Soma was not used to the constant calls for photographs and interviews. Thus, Soma just tentatively raised his and flashed the "V" with a full mouth grin.

Amidst all of the shouts for interviews and photos, Soma could only do one thing and that was compare himself to his father. It was an unhealthy obsession, really. Soma could not help it though; his father was the one person he looked up to now—especially, after his mom passed away. His Dad had what Soma truly wanted—respect from all people. People did not look down at his father for his diner background nor did the deify him because of his "Asura" days. People just respected him for his talent in the kitchen. But the biggest reason why he envied his father, is due to his relationship with a certain Blonde head master of Totsuki academy.

'I really did it. I really did it. Take that one old man.' Soma thought to himself. A broad grin could not help but be formed. He was relishing in his victory.

Soma took a moments time to look around him. What Soma saw was not surprising to him. People were wearing dumfounded and shocked expressions because they didn't expect him to win. Like usual, Soma was the prohibitive underdog and once again Soma persevered.

One of the main things that irked Soma about the culinary world was their elitist culture. A culture that made it hard for a boy like him to gain any traction in 'their' world. He hoped that if he won it would change the prevailing stereotypes and change the prevailing norms. No one except a few select people believed that Soma could accomplish this. That is why Soma owed a lot to Megumi, Takumi, Pops, and the rest of his polar star roommates. Their belief in him is what allowed him to win the Shokugeki. However, these people's belief in him paled in comparison to the amount of hurt he faced due to a certain blond.

Going down this toxic line of thought, his mind naturally went to Erina Nakiri—the girl he realized he loved. And now she was the girl that did not believe in him. He would have sworn that she would have been at his side, like he was for her. This is because after the Regiment de Cuisine their relationship had progressed slowly, until he considered her one of his closest friends.

Or so she thought.

Little did Erina know that Soma did not think of her as just a friend but rather he loved her with all of his heart. Sure, at the beginning he saw her as a friend, but those feelings morphed into something more after he saw what she truly was under her debonair façade. She was a prideful, stubborn, and sweet girl who challenged him and made him want to improve his cooking. These qualities made him realized that he loves her. And now he understood what this phrase meant: "_The ones you love the most will always hurt you the most." _When she betrayed him (that is how he saw it in his eyes), it felt like his heart was being pushed through a human- sized meat grinder. It became hard to breathe and honestly it was hard for him to live.

As usual Soma's thoughts concerning Erina spiraled out of control until he finally caught himself. That's what happens when you are in love.

'Gods, I can't think about Erina right now. I _should _try to act happy,' Soma thought with a groan. He posted a smile to his face and tried to act the way he should. Soma's face; however, belied the deep pain he felt in his soul.

Steeling his emotions, his face turned into one more believable, almost overly so—one of extreme elation. Soma turned his body around and he saw the tall, lanky body of his father, Yukihara Joichiro running at a dead sprint towards him. His father looked disheveled but relieved, his normally luscious hair was matted down and shiny. Soma and his father had a strange dynamic in their relationship. It was more of a sibling dynamic than a father-son dynamic.

But Soma knew that his father would be able to feel his emotions when he went on his monologue with Mana Nakiri. Even if no one else understood his message if his father knew what he meant, he would be fine. After all, Joichirou is the only person alive who loved Soma's mother as much as Soma did.

Joichiro exclaimed as he was panting, "Soma, you did it my boy! I am so proud of you and your mom would be too!" Soma was caught off guard with his father's comment because he sounded like an actual dad rather than the rival. His Dad ditched the child-like persona he took when interacting with the younger Yukihara. His father's words of adoration caused Soma to take an abnormally long amount of time to formulate any sort of response.

Soma's dad was kind of an absentee, he wasn't in Soma's childhood for long spurts of time. Soma knew that his Dad cared for him, but the lack of his constant presence robbed Soma and his father at a chance for a normal father and son relationship.

When Soma did respond, choking back tears, he said: "Thanks pops, that means a lot to me. I hope she would be too" Soma's father then looked at his son sympathetically and smiled. However, this was not an ordinary Yukihara smile—which was arrogant and seemed closer to a smirk. No, this was a smile that could only be elicited when his dead wife was brought up. The smile itself was serene and nostalgic and it was the only time that Joichiro truly looked his age instead of the young and vibrant chef. And with this parting glance Soma turned away from his dad.

Soma's body was riding the adrenaline high he felt from his match against Asahi Saiba, however now it felt as though his body was going to crash. His body went slack, his knees buckled, and it felt as though someone punched him right in the gut. Soma toppled over; all of his weight transferred to his stomach. He nearly hit the cold hard floor and fainted. However, instead of hitting the ground, his pops caught him. His father may not have been around a lot when he was younger-until his mom passed away, but Soma knew that his father would forsake the world for him. This is the reason why he was not surprised that his father caught him—his father always caught him whether it be from himself, his cooking, or from his life.

Soma must have been standing there for hours because each second, he was planted on the floor, he was tempting fate. For, the voice he least wanted to heat came into his ears. And in that moment, he _actually _wished his father would have just let him faint so that he would not have to deal with the constant headache that was, Erina Nakiri.

"Soma-kun!" came the piercing voice that belonged to the blonde-haired headmistress of Totsuki academy who was also the bane of Soma's sad existence. Her beautiful honey-blonde hair was hanging down to the sides of her face and her cute, fuzzy sideburns were practically begging to be played with. She started with an energetic voice, "I knew you could do it and—" Soma had to abruptly cut her off.

"No, you did not," he replied harshly and crisply, "You thought I was going to lose, and you were hoping I would lose. So please don't lie to me by saying you believed in me, it hurts me too much." Soma was wearing his heart on his sleeve; he knew it and did not care. Gone was the boy who didn't let other's people hatred and vitriol get in his head, gone was the calm and collected boy that always seemed to have a happy face. And in his place was a wounded boy who was spurned by his beloved.

Saying these words was breaking Soma's heart into a thousand pieces, like grains of sand running through your hands, not being able to be picked out. He loved her so much that he would go to hell twice for her. Heck, he basically did go to _hell _for her, at least that is what it felt like during Azami's reign of terror. He couldn't however shake off the emotional wounds and the hurt she caused him recently. These wounds could not heal overnight. And he needed time to recover and reflect. Normally Soma was a pretty lax guy, but Erina's words and actions pierced him like a fatal sword wound. He _would _not forgive her easily.

Erina's face looked as though she got a slap to the face. A person could see that her haughtiness was threatening to come out. Thankfully for her, she was able to reign her emotions in on time. She stood in front of Soma and pondered for a moment, trying to formulate the correct words. Erina looked as though she was treading carefully, not wanting to poke the proverbial sleeping bear. She started by saying, "Look Soma, did I think you were going to win? No and I don't think anyone else here thought you were going to win too. Does that mean I can't be happy for you to win? No, I am extremely happy that you won and that I don't have to marry Asahi-Sabai! Like honestly, get off your high horse and stop being mad at me; you should honestly be glad that I'm even be talking to you! With you be a commoner and all…" she ended her tirade with a shriek, and she looked genuinely miffed. Her voice was exponentially rising as she continued speaking. It sounded more like she was trying to convince herself that she was in the right rather than trying to calm down Soma's anger.

Soma's face resembled a plaster wall, hard and white. He could not believe what he was hearing. How could the girl he loved be so cruel and dense? And people said _he was _dense. Couldn't she see that she wounded him deeply? Or maybe she did, and she just didn't care? And he thought that Erina got over her superiority complex, but it seems as though it came back in full force.

After Soma's initial shock wore off, he realized that he should be angry! And during that one moment, all of Soma's pent up anger towards Erina, Asahi, Pops, and BLUE came out channeled at a single person for the whole world to see. It came out like a volcano pent up with pressure or like a bomb ready to explode.

* * *

Soma's Pov:

"I should be happy? Who do you think you are, Erina? I though that we were friends, but I guess I was nothing more than a puppet to you—someone you can manipulate into thinking you care about. Just some low-class boy who you _grace _with your presence. You know, people always used to call you names behind your back and I always used to defend you against their onslaught. But now I think they might be right, that you might just be a cold-hearted per—BITCH that's not capable of love! And guess what Erina I am the _true son _of Asura and when the final comes… I will do what my father did before to his opponents; I will destroy you." I ended my emotional tirade by sending Erina a look that I can only describe as pure hatred. Afterwards, I had to leave so I stalked out towards the hallway.

I needed to get out of there. My eyes could only look one way and that was directed towards the door that offered me solace from the pain that I was feeling. I could not help but feel a tad guilty; I mean I basically called her a bitch. But I shouldn't feel guilty though, right? This was the Freudian battle my mind was going through, my ego was forced to appease my superego. Eventually a consensus occurred and 'she deserved it' is what my conscious said. And with this my mind was satiated and I had no further qualms. I'm sure though that if people were to look at my face, they would see hot, betrayed, tears cascading down my face. And as it turns out however only one person saw, my father.

And with that I made my way through the throngs of people and left without a single interview taken or a single word to any of my friends. I had to leave; my emotional distress was starting to overpower any semblance of self-control I had remaining. I was not even angry anymore; I was just sad and downright depressed. And it was in that moment of depression that I made up my mind: I would throw away any love that I have for Erina and instead use the hurt and hate I feel to destroy her during the finals. And that was the most content I felt that whole day.

I left with a small smile on my face.

* * *

Yukihara Joichiro knew he was not the best dad; he knew that some people would have to be hard-pressed to even classify him as a father. He always looks back at a certain memory. One of the lowest moments of his life. It's when he remembers the first words that Soma said to him after he came for his wife's funeral.

"Dad what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be working?" Soma asked with a Child's curious expression on his face. Soma wasn't trying to be rude or mean, it was merely a child's insatiable thirst for knowledge. But that did not make the words hurt any less, they were like a dish that was too hot and began to burn the tip of your tongue. And he did not like it all.

And he had an epiphany. It was at that moment that Saiba Joichiro became a figment of the past, a figment of a past life. He was then forever to be Yukihara Joichiro for Soma's sake as well as for his own. He would not be a stranger to his son anymore, he would make a more concerted effort to connect with his son. For, he already has missed so many moments of Soma's life. He had let it go to the point that his own son didn't expect him to attend _his _wife's funeral. He was no father to the boy he absolutely adored. But after Soma's innocent question he decided to try his hardest to make up for all of those moments he missed. There were many milestones of a young person's life that he wasn't able to appreciate with his wife and son. His first words, his first steps, his first birthday, and the one that hurt the most, his own son's birth, were all things he had missed and couldn't gain back. These were the regrets that he would carry for the rest of his living days and sometimes they _ate_ him alive.

But no one could ever say that Yukihara Joichirou did not love his son. After his dear wife passed away, he lived for his son. It turned into the reason why Joichiro even continued to cook, his deep adoration and fatherly love instead of his love for Tamako (which would never leave).

And that's why the scene that just played before his very eyes struck him so deeply. He knew his son like the back of his hand, so he knew he loved Erina. And anyone who paid even the slightest bit of attention would see it too. Luckily, he also knew that in some twisted and skewed way that Erina loved Soma. The problem seemed to be that Erina did not know it yet and that she inadvertently hurt the man that cared the most about her, bar maybe her grandfather.

"Ha-Ha-Ha-Ah" he bellowed, a deep throaty laugh.

'The Irony' he thought to himself. It seems as though fate did not want Soma to know Joichiro's advice, but rather Erina. He came to the conclusion that Erina needed to have a little push so that she would be able to realize the extent of her feelings towards Soma. And maybe then she would be able to shed her tsundere nature.

When he thought about the hopefully burgeoning trajectory of Soma and Erina's relationship, it brought to mind his own relationship with his wife. His wife and he were totally different in terms of personality and skill, but their differences are what made them work so well together as chefs—if you would call her that—and partners. He could only hope that it would all work out for his son in the end too.

After all, isn't that what all parents wish for their children—happiness?

"Tamako, I hope you'd be happy with what I'm about to do. It's all for Soma. It's always been for Soma." He said in a low grumble. And at the end of those words, Joichiro made his way towards Erina, (hopefully) his future daughter-in-law.

* * *

Erina on the other hand, looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Her body was convulsing, her breath was ragged, and her eyes were wide as though they had seen a ghost. Many thoughts were running through the blonde-haired girl's head, namely: 'How did it devolve into this?' 'Did people really say those mean and hurtful things about me?' 'And what is this inexplicable pain in my heart?' Tears could not help but form in her amethyst eyes. As much as Erina tried to prove otherwise, she was still a teenager and teenagers had feelings.

She felt as though she was in a black abyss of sorrow and it was her usual savior who pushed her over the ledge. Erina could not help but feel betrayed by Soma-kun, 'Wasn't he supposed to be my friend?' she thought to herself. The thought made her heart feel as though she was getting pressed through a pasta maker. But then, the metaphorical lightbulb flashed in her brain and suddenly the gravity of what she had said, hit her. She realized that she basically told Soma that she did not care about his feelings and that he was lower than her. She has not felt that way since the event with her father.

"What kind of friend would do that?" She said at loud to herself, not caring if anyone heard her. And then she realized that a friend would not have said anything like that, only a mean person would. Her sobs broke out for the whole world to see; her sobs were choked and throaty which was not a good look for the Totsuki princess. She felt numb all throughout her body which seemed to be a little over the top, even for her.

'Why do I feel like this?' She thought to herself, startling herself with her lack of empathy. Erina had not felt this sense of dread since her father was trying to control her. 'Is Soma-kun that big a part of my life?' Is the natural response her conscious came up with.

Well, she was about to find out.

Erina's idol, Saiba Joichiro—Soma's Dad! —was walking towards her. Erina was not able to see him in time however due to the heart-wrenching pain that took precedent over any other sense.

Erina was pulled out of her reverie when her idol gently called her, "Erina, are you all right? You look a little down." Her idol must have heard her argument with Soma and he was mad at her! Right?

She quickly fixed her hair and patted down her outfit. She could not allow Saiba-sama to see her in this state. Finally, satisfied with her appearance, she replied: "Oh, Hello Saiba-sama, um everything is fine; yes, everything is fine, just a little mentally drained is all." It took all of her mental fortitude to not break down right there in front of her idol and Soma's father.

* * *

Erina was trying her hardest to stay sane for her idol and her mentor—it wasn't working. Joichiro was able to sense the girls stress and decided to cut to the chase and let the girl out of her misery. He would do this by imparting the same knowledge that he tried to bestow upon Soma, who naturally hung up before he heard the advice.

"Erina" he started "Can I give you a piece of friendly advice?"

She quickly interjected, "Of course, Saiba-sama. Anything you say, I hold in such a high regard!" Erina looked like a lost puppy, who was willing to latch onto anything that could be construed as good.

Joichiro steadied himself, as this conversation would either go great or go horribly. He took a deep breath and began to give his "wisdom" to Erina: "Full disclaimer, I'm not saying this as a chef but as a person who has seen many things in my life." Erina shook her head in affirmation and motioned for him to continue. "Alright Erina, in order to truly be happy and truly be a great chef, you need someone who makes you want to cook for them the rest of your life. Someone who makes you laugh, makes you cry, makes you so annoyed that you want to hit them, but most of all someone who makes you feel loved. Someone who loves you and who you love in return. Someone who would move the world for you and not even ask for a thanks. And when that person is found, do not let them go even if your life depends on it." Saiba finished his mini-speech with a soft, nostalgic look that was plastered on his face. If a person new him well, they would say that this was the look that he reserved for when he was thinking about his long-deceased wife, Tamako. Saiba did not feel the need to wait for Erina to respond so he walked off and left Erina to ponder this new knowledge.

He softly murmured to himself, "For you Soma, it's always been for you."

* * *

"Laugh, Cry, Annoy, repeat" Erina whispered to herself; she was thinking long and hard about what her idol just told her. 'Who makes me feel like that?' she thought. And suddenly a gasp escaped her perfectly shaped lips and what followed was a cascade of tears. She finally realized the fundamental truth of her life. Which was that she loved Soma, his brazen attitude, his lax approach to cooking, his annoying habits, all of him. For the first time since she was a young girl—before her mother left and her father started abusing her—she felt complete. It was as if she unlocked a deep-seeded secret. One that made her feel fuzzy on the inside, one that seemed to swallow her whole into a protective wrap—a lot like a big hug. A secret that was made all the sweeter with the time that it festered in the bowels of heart. Until it became ready to burst like a geyser, showering her with happiness. She could not help but let out a heart-warming squeal, one that seemed as though it could brighten up the whole arena. The squeal divulged into short, small, and happy sobs. The girl was put through an emotional rollercoaster and it was only beginning.

But then the sobs turned into loud and choked whines. "Classic Erina, he hates you now! Why couldn't you figure it out earlier! Baka, Baka, Baka!" She said as her voice was in a shaky muffled groan that was obscured by her choking voice. She never wanted to hurt him, but she was protecting herself from her own mistakes. A regret that she hoped to rectify if Soma would allow her a chance.

What people did not understand though was that Erina was broken, years of neglect and abuse at the hands of her parents made sure of that. She did not know what love was (it surely was not the same as the love from her Shoujo manga). Sure, she understood it as an abstract concept, but she never experienced it. The closest she felt to love was from her Grandfather, but that was still a bastardized form of love that came from his love of Mana not Erina. Her father may love her in a sick and twisted way but not in any way that's suitable for a child.

And then her blessing—or maybe, her curse—the god tongue made it hard for her to admit to anything. She was raised to carry herself with this air of gravitas and superiority. And it was not until Soma that she wanted to be anything else than what she was raised to be. Soma made her want to be a commoner—though, she would never say that out loud. She never thought that she wouldn't mind going back to a small city and working in a family diner for the rest of life _if _it meant that her love would be with her. She always thought that she was meant for the main stage, her work showcased throughout the world. However, throughout the year her priorities seemingly changed before her eyes.

It is because of Soma that she is able to feel emotions that she did not think she could feel, make her think things that she did not think she could think, and make here dream things she didn't think she'd be able to dream. These dreams were one of a future, a future that didn't revolve around cooking, one in which she was just a normal girl and he was just a normal boy and they were doing normal people things.

In order for her to achieve these dreams, to reach the normalcy that she was always secretly craving. She knew what she had to do. She needed to win BLUE. She needed to cook for Soma, and she would show him, her love for him through her dish. A dish that could perfectly convey her dreams of the future, a future for him and her. And only then would he maybe forgive her and give her a chance.

"Oh, that would be a dream," she said out loud with a sigh looking like a lovestruck girl.

So, with her aspirations in her mind, Erina steeled her resolve and decided that she would make Soma-kun bow down to her cooking and in return bow down to her feelings for him. She wouldn't beat him for the sake of beating him but rather, for the sake of conveying her emotions to him in the best way she could.

Erina never would have thought that she would fall for the red-headed boy who made her so angry at his entrance exam. But finally, she acknowledged the feelings that she felt. And her feelings now held an iron-clad lock hold on her heart. It was as if one albatross was switched for another. Erina would much rather have this albatross across her neck, though.

She realized that she could not waste any more time. So, she began formulating ideas for her dish. Of course, it would have to be something that held sentimental value to them both. Maybe, something with egg? Or with tempura? She didn't know, all she knew was that it was imperative that she show him how much she cared for him—she didn't want to think about how it wasn't necessarily going to work. Erina normally wasn't one for sentimentality, but she needed to change, and soma was the spur that pushed her forward. And in this moment, Erina realized that she would do anything for Soma—her one true love.

So then, Erina took her phone out and scrolled towards the "H" contacts. She pressed the name of her aide and waited for her to answer.

Finally, her aide picked up her phone and Erina then spoke, "Hisako, you there?" Her aid responded in affirmation. "Okay, I need you to get a kitchen set up for me…pronto. And bring some egg and make them cheap ones!" And with that Erina hung up and left the auditorium for her own personal kitchen to get ready for the long night ahead of her.

* * *

Wow! That was a lot. I hope you feel some of the emotion that I was attempting to invoke in you. Honestly, that took way longer than I expected it to. I was sitting on this story for at least a month and a half. I still don't feel as though its good enough, so I will probably be making edits throughout the month. I want to make sure it is of the highest quality that I can possibly put out. And if I get a solid response from you guys, I will continue the story! If not, then I will scratch it as a loss.

So now it is time for some clarifications on the plot of the story and certain characterizations. The story stays mostly canon until the battle with Saiba. After that Shokugeki, the story is going to branch off into my own continuation. Soma is more affected by Erina's lack of trust in him and his abilities than in cannon. This will be the driving force of most of the conflict. Another major facet of the story is the flip-flopping of the feelings that Soma and Erina have. They are both going to go through some emotional turmoil before they can reach the end. Most of the major characters are going to be a little OOC. It was bound to happen because I had to make the characters fit my writing style and I need them to be a little more emotional. After all, I really want to tug on all of your heart strings. Soma is going to be less dense than in canon and he is also going to be moodier. While Erina is going to be more receptive to Soma's feelings and she is going to have to sort them all out and act on them in a less toxic way.

My plans for this fic include at least six chapters and 40,000 words. I don't have an exact schedule. But if this story gets likes then I will start working on the next chapter as soon as possible.

-Until next time, hopefully…

The ties that bind us.


	2. Soma

Hey everyone, it's The Ties That Bind Us and I'm back with the second chapter of my Shokugeki no Soma Fanfiction. I know it has been a while, but I have been waiting for the final epilogue chapter to come out. And let me tell you how I feel about it. It was meh. I mean, I wasn't expecting much to begin with, but I really hated how Tsukada gave us no concrete validation for Soma x Erina. Anyways, I really want to thank everyone who read the first chapter of my story and especially everyone who has commented/liked/followed it. All of your support has given me the strength I needed to continue the story. I sincerely hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

Disclaimer: I own no rights to any of the places or characters represented in this story, everything is owned by the creators of Shokugeki no Soma.

* * *

Chapter 2: Soma's Night

Soma's POV

Finally, I reach my destination and my solace, the kitchen. I opened the door and let out a long sigh of relief, here I can ponder and reflect on what happened today. I spend some time grazing my hands over all of the utensils sitting on the counter—the knives, forks, spoons, and whisks—and it calms me down. The events of the day took out a big chunk of my energy. I got down onto the cold floor and laid down, not caring about the chill that it brought me. My eyes close and my mind goes back to when I realized my feelings for Erina:

_Flashback to the Stagiaire:_

"_Yukihara! What travesty are you creating this time?" harped the voice of the coral-headed chef, Kojirou Shinomiya. Soma his been over in his new restaurant, Shino's Tokyo, for the last month or so. He has been working with the former 1__st__ seat—or rather, working __**for **__the former 1__st__ seat. Soma has been noticing that his skill has been growing exponentially and even Shinomiya agrees. Chef Shinomiya secretly goes a step further and thinks that it is only a matter of time until Soma will pass himself in terms of food quality. _

_But in order to pass him and all of the top chefs in the world, Soma would need certain attributes. The first attribute he needed was the drive to push forward. And boy, did he have that in spades. Nothing seemed to faze the boy, he could lose and be bullied, it didn't matter he kept pushing onwards. The second and more important thing that he needed was love. He needed it so that when things got tight and he wanted to stop cooking, he had a person there and ready to help him. Someone who he would go to the precipice of the culinary world for._

_This led to a peculiar question that Shinomiya felt compelled to voice._

"_Ayy, Yukihara" No response, as usual. "Hey, come on. I'm talking to you." To Shinomiya it seemed as though Soma was enthralled in his own world. _

_Soma's eyes were locked on the pan in front of him. He was looking at it as though it were the most beautiful sight his eyes had ever seen. Shinomiya looked through Soma's eyes and was astonished. The look his eyes gave showed the mark of a true chef—a true artist. It was a look that a sculptor would get when chiseling out a limb or an artist would get when mixing paint together. His eyes were gently looking at the masterpiece while his fingers molded the ingredients together. It truly was a treat to look at._

_Soma's ears finally registered the background noise and he realized that his teacher was calling out to him. _

"_Yo Senpai, you asked something?" Soma's eyes left the pan and he seemed to be expecting an answer. _

_Shinomiya tried to suppress his eye roll, but he could not. So, with a roll of an eye , he responded, "Ya I do. And you would've known if you were paying any attention to me—your __**boss." **_

_He scoffed and said under his breath, "Hmphhh, kids."_

_Soma looked like a dog waiting expectantly for its master. Shinomiya then pressed on, "Anyways, what makes you want to cook? What drives you to become better?"_

_Shinomiya needed to ask this because any chef in the upper crust of the craft needed that spur that kept them moving forward. Something for when their drive finally depleted, they had the necessary person to help them move forward. _

_The reason why Shinomiya knew this is simple—he heard it. He heard many stories from high-ranking chefs about the "storm" and the "culinary wastelands." How even the greatest chefs were swallowed up and spit out. How they turned away from their craft due to the pressure of culinary exploration. It took a certain kind of person to be able to travel and brave the culinary wastelands and come back unscathed. And with Soma's drive and ability to lose but still get up—Shinomiya believed he was one of these people._

_Shinomiya took this time to think about his person—his mother. Shinomiya drew power from her and his need to give her the food she deserved—food fit for a queen. He had no time to get burned out, not until he gave his mother all the cooking he had to give._

_And truthfully, if Soma did not have something on par with Shinomiya's connection to his mother, then Soma could not reach his full potential. Shinomiya had recognized the potential of his minor. Sure, he was not the most naturally talented chef—he was not born with any super power that made cooking easier—but he had a drive that could push him up towards the stars._

_Soma face looked as though he was in a drunken stupor as he was trying to figure out the answer to his senpai's question. His face scrunched up and all of the creases in his face were on display._

_He finally opened his mouth to respond and just as quickly it closed. He was back to thinking. Finally, he seemed to realize the answer and spoke, "Well hmmm, I guess the reason would have to be so I could beat my dad and inherit Yukihara's!" A goofy grin was plastered across Soma's face._

_Shinomiya, being perceptive, could see how his grin did not reach his eyes. Soma was either lying or not telling the whole truth. And lying pissed Shinomiya off, more than anything._

_The elder chef needed to take a calming breath before he responded very slowly, "Don't lie to me Yukihara. Tell me the real reason—now!" His voice grew to a shout by the end of his sentence._

_The normal brash and arrogant face of Soma Yukihara turned softer as a light blush adorned his features. With a small smile he spoke, "Well I guess… it's for Erina. I want her to like my cooking—wait, no—I __**need**__ her to like my cooking. She always calls my cooking disgusting and I __**can't **__have her saying that. When she says that my heart hurts and I need to be alone. So, the reason why I cook is for her! And, everything I do is for…her?"_

_Soma went on to explain how Erina hates him and does not seem to enjoy his presence at all. To say that Shinomiya was shocked would be an understatement. The chef was completely perplexed he liked the Princess of Totsuki, huh. He never would've thought, that girl seems way to stuck up and gaudy for Soma to be into her. But to each their own he supposes._

_And even so, in the end, this was an amazing development! This was what Shinomiya was hoping for, more even—something that was powerful enough to keep Soma's mind in the right headspace so he could weather the storm. And who knows maybe the Totsuki Princess will become more receptive to his feelings than he thinks._

_Suddenly Soma stood up and looked ghastly, his face looked like milky white paste. He started speaking rapidly towards his teacher, "Shinomiya, I need to call my pops. Is that okay?" The kid looked winded, scared, and he needed his dad. Shinomiya could at least do that for him._

"_Sure, just make sure you are back soon. You still need to mop my floors." He responded and then his eyes flickered to his hands where his restaurant's new menu rested._

_Soma scuttled over to the open door for some privacy. After he closed the door to the restroom, he took out his phone and prayed to any number of gods that he could of think of that his dad would answer. _

_When he dialed his father's phone number, his feet tapped the tile floor impatiently. As soon as he thought the phone call was going to voicemail, his father answered._

_The lax voice of Joichirou permeated through the speaker, "Yo, what's up brat? Everything good?" By the end of his sentence any person could hear the father's concern seeping through._

_Soma's voice dripped of confusion and fear when he said, "I have a question, pops, and please answer me truthfully. Have you ever met a person that all you want to do is cook for them? And when you're with them you do not have another care in the world? If someone feels that way about someone, is that love?"_

_In that moment, his father had an epiphany. Soma wasn't a little boy anymore, but he was on the cusp of manhood. So, he needed to answer him truthfully._

"_Soma, I have felt this way towards two people in my life" Joichirou took a moment to let the words seep into Soma, "the first person who I felt this for was your mother and the second person was you. What you are experiencing is love, my boy. You cannot let it go. You need to let it propel you forward and—"_

_Soma immediately blurted out, "Its Erina, Dad! I love Erina, ya' know the Totsuki princess—blonde hair, amethyst eyes, and the most arrogant personality? You know which one I mean, right? Oh dear, I'm not good enough for her and—" Soma started rambling he could not stop blabbering to his father._

_Now it was Joichirou's turn to cut off Soma, "Cut that out Soma, do not say that. It doesn't matter who she is or who you are, all that matters is that you love her. Be there for her and all will turn out okay. But um, hey listen, I got to go. The USA's president wants me to cook him something with Cheetos. Weird guy, that one." _

_Soma was then greeted with silence as his father's phone call cut off. Soma now was left alone to deal with his conflicting emotions._

_Soma reckoned that he should feel happy but, he could not help but feel bitter-sweet about his revelation. It was not doubt about who he loved or the advice that his father told him. Rather, it was his doubts about the personality of the girl. Contrary to popular opinion, Soma was not naïve or stupid; he knew she did not like him. It really was not that hard to see—even a blind man could tell. The way her aura seems to turn five shades darker than black when he was there. Or the way she always voiced her displeasure about his status as a diner cook. But Soma was not a quitter and the heart want what the heart wants._

_This led to Soma having a bitter thought, 'If only she knew that my dad was a former second seat. Maybe then she would recognize that I do have some pedigree.,' Soma shook his head at the thought. That would not work. It would only show that she cares more about his family and their history then she does about who he is. He would conceal his history from her in the hopes that she would love him for him and for his father._

_In the end, Soma came to the conclusion that all he could do is try to show her that he was worthy of standing next to her atop the culinary mountain and atop of her world. When he shows her that, maybe then she would see what he has to offer. After all Soma wanted was to be happy and he hoped that maybe they would be able to provide that for each other._

_He needs to push forward. He cannot get bogged down. Not for his own sake but for the sake of Erina. He would crawl forward if he needed to. He just needed to push forward. By moving he can get closer to Erina and close the gap between them. Thus, being her equal. Now he has a goal and an inspiration, and nothing could stop him from reaching it._

_Soma realizes that he has spent way too much time pondering his feelings rather than helping his senpai, Shinomiya, get his restaurant ready. He unlocks the restroom's door and goes to his Stagiaire chef and tells him, "Hey Shinomiya-sensei, I want to submit a dish for your new menu. Will you let me?"_

_All Shinomiya could do was nod his head and say something about not messing around. In all reality, Shinomiya's body was in auto pilot. The only reaction he had control over was the small smile he had adorning his face. The reason for this smile was simple—he knew. He knew that Soma had found his reason for cooking. He could only think about how Soma now had the necessary support for his inevitable journey into the storm had that was cooking. _

_Shinomiya liked Soma Yukihara and he will be waiting for him when his younger pupil meets him on the top of the culinary world._

* * *

Soma's POV

I open my eyes which were now brimming with tears. Tears that I would rather keep bound up in my eyes. But in all honesty, not much has changed since the stagiaire. Sure, Erina has gotten a little nicer, but that was more due to what I did, not what she thinks. It is almost like she has taken me for granted.

This is why I still do not know how I feel about Erina and my love for her, there are times when she makes me feel utterly ecstatic and then there are moments—albeit less frequent moments—when she makes me feel like utter garbage. I know that the one-sided love I have for her is toxic and yet I cannot pull myself away.

And that is why I _need _to win against her. It's me letting her go, letting go of my dream and passion. After my fiery tirade against her and her behavior which proceeded my match against Asahi, I realized I am not truly mad at her. I do not think I ever could be. Rather, I'm sad. I do not feel the compulsive need to destroy her anymore, but I want to win to achieve closure for myself.

Believing she could love me was just a dream, I suppose. How could she ever love a simpleton like me? What could I offer her? The answers to both of those questions are bad. As a matter of fact, I am not entirely sure if she is able to love someone in the traditional sense. I know that she can care for someone, but love? I do not think so. I can only pray that I will get over Erina and find someone who could truly love me for me.

* * *

'Scorned Lover'

I read that phrase once and it perfectly captures the emotions I'm through. That phrase is going to be my inspiration for the dish. I'm going to make a dish for all of the people who have felt the pain of unrequited love. If I were to liken the dish to music, it would be a classical piece. A soft and somber tune the elicits heartache and sorrow. It would lull the listener to a restless sleep. The dish could be described as a total flip from my last creation. Instead of a dish that was powerful and bombarded you with flavors, this one would draw out the most minuscule flavors and then caress the eater in a faint embrace.

Well, at least, that's the plan. Other than this abstract idea, I have no idea what I'm doing. It's like using a map without a compass. I have a starting point but nothing else to build off of. It seems as though; I won't be sleeping tonight…again.

As soon as I decided to pull an all-nighter, in what could only be described as a simple twist of fate, my eyes started to flutter, and I was soon enveloped into a dreamscape.

'_Knock-Knock-Knock' _

_Unaware that I was sleeping, I heard someone banging on the door. I walk over and open it, my foolish heart thinking that it was Erina._

_Wait, who am I kidding? Why would she come here?_

_Instead of my blonde love, it is just my friends, Takumi and Megumi. I was greatly relieved that it was them instead of Erina because maybe they can help me blueprint my dish. However, I was sorely mistaken._

_My two friend's faces were contorted into an expression which could only be described as pity. I cannot stand to look at them when they have those expressions. In fact, my pet peeve is being pitied. That is because it goes against my innate competitive nature. And to see it on my friend's faces only amplifies the feeling._

_And then right in front of me, their faces morph again. Their expressions turn cold, almost like a freshly chiseled marble slab. Their eyes turn to ice and they narrow—piercing through my soul like an arrow._

_They had no looks of friendship, only loathing._

_Megumi looked at me with thinly-veiled disgust. She gave me a look of pure hatred, a look that made me seem as insignificant as a bug. Her voice permeated through the kitchen, "You really thought you had a chance with her? Pathetic." My eyes naturally started to water from the verbal jab that my sweetest friend gave me. _

_Then it was Takumi's turn._

"_To think that someone like her, would degrade herself by lying with you. We all thought you were naïve, but are you just plain stupid? Wait, stupid Soma, that actually has a nice ring to it," Takumi sneered at me._

_The tears were now cascading down my face like a roaring rapid as my "friends" began to laugh at me._

_My body goes down to its knees and I start to crawl away from them, the pain of their words coming in doles. The words latched on to my botched self-confidence, drowning me like a weight attached to someone at sea. _

_And then the scene changes._

_Suddenly, I was watching an awkward sight. A giant Octopus had its tentacles surrounding my friends. The scene seemed forced and it looked like they did not enjoy it. It was not what I expected, they seemed to be about to pass out in disgust. Their bodies were contorted into different shapes and sweat was dripping off their bodies._

_Their voices turned into a choir, "Ahhhhhhhh. What is this horrible taste! Get away from me, you stupid octopus. Stop, please, I don't want this!" They were thrashing and just seemed utterly horrible—sort of like I am now._

_And then I had the lightbulb go off in my head, I realized that this is what happens when they eat one of my "new" dishes. _

'_I could use this' I thought. And I suddenly gained the most ambition I had since the previous round._

* * *

The world around seems to be twisting and moving. The view fades and it is all black. I just relax waiting for my body to awaken. Suddenly, my eyes open and the real world comes firing back into reality.

The dreams I had offered me a lot of food for thought. I cannot help but think that I'm going about my dish all wrong. I should not be trying to make a sad dish, instead, I should be trying to make the most disgusting dish I can. That would be the one way to truly convey the hate I felt yesterday, and to then let it go.

Peanut butter, squid, intestines, pig eyes, it does not matter. All of these ingredients will combine to make the most horrible dish I can.

'Oh man. I almost feel bad for Mana Nakiri. Will her tongue be able to handle this monstrosity?' I thought rhetorically. Of course, I know her tongue can't. It makes me almost feel bad for her; she should not be forced to eat this disgusting concoction. However, then I am reminded of all of the horrible things she did to Erina and Myself. Suddenly, I do not feel so bad for her anymore. She's only going to get what's coming to her.

But now I have an interesting problem, how will I get her to eat my dish?

If she knows what is in it from the beginning, she won't even get within a foot of it!

I have to mask the flavor as I did with the dish against Asahi-Saiba. So that she won't know what's in it until the moment she gets to 'enjoy' my dish. And by that time she'll be too far gone to even think about it.

I feel like an evil scientist coming up with a dastardly plan and the Nakiri's won't know what hit them!

I'm knocked out of my reverie by real knocks at my door. Feeling extremely elated about my plan, I skip over to the door. And to my surprise, it is the two central figures in my dreams, Takumi and Megumi!

"Yo, what's up guys? What are you doing over here?" I say. It isn't that I do not want them with me, I just didn't expect for them to come over.

After I said that, steam starts coming out of Takumi's ears, and he looks livid. Megumi, on the other hand, starts convulsing and seems as though she is about to pass out. While Megumi is nearly catatonic, Takumi decides to take the lead and speak for both of them.

"Yukihara, do you even know what time it is? Look at the clock!" His face was turning red from yelling. After he notices how loud he was becoming, he mutters an apology under his breath.

My eye's then darted to the old analog clock hanging over the doorway and I could sense my pupils dilating as I registered the time.

It seems as though I overslept worse than I expected. I have less than a day to finish my dish. Damn, that's not a great way to start my day!

My mouth starts to move mindlessly, and I say to my friends, "Crap! I slept way too long. I really need to start working." My friends look at me, concern marred their faces and I know why.

I look disheveled—almost comparable to a classic mountain man. I have scruff adorning my neck and dried food is stuck under my nails. After I got back from the competition yesterday, I had no motivation to clean myself up. Normally I look pretty clean shaven too, so my friends must think there's something really wrong.

This time it was Megumi who took the lead. She started speaking softly, trying not to make me mad. She said, "Soma-kun, how are you doing?"

Oh god, how I hate those kinds of questions.

She presses on, "I know yesterday must have been tough for you. Just know that Takumi and I are here for you, okay?"

I feel somewhat relieved that she did not press me on what happened with Erina. Takumi, on the other hand, lacked any of the tacts that Megumi exhibited. He said, "Soma, tell us what is wrong. Now!"

What he said caused my anger to start boiling over—what right did he have to tell me what to do? I sneer at him and he cowers behind Megumi. Takumi looks truly frightened.

Shaking my head, I calm down and realize that they are just trying to look out for me. Armed with this new knowledge I say: "Sorry guys, I am just really drained, and I have so much to do. I cannot really talk right now." I start to walk away, my patience with my closest friends starting to wear thin.

Megumi and Takumi give me one more passing glance and then they walk to the door and I am suddenly left alone. Just my thoughts and a kitchen. Nothing can be better.

With my new solace, I start to cook. I feel the pulse and aura of all the utensils and it's like their hearts are beating under my fingertips. I check the pantry for all of the ingredients I need for my first trial dish.

* * *

The amount of happiness I get from cooking is dwindling, I don't have a purpose anymore, I'm stuck in this wasteland and no one is there to pull me out.

Deep down, I'm hoping for Erina to turn a leaf and kick me out of the funk I am in. I think it's because deep down I know that I cannot cook without her and what she brings out of me. And that's scary as hell.

A little voice in my head was crying out for her and hoping she was able to hear it.

A/N: Alright that is the end of the chapter! How did you like it? I really hope you enjoyed it. I had a really bad case of writer's block for the better part of the month. But I really wanted to put this out for you guys. So, apologies in advance, if some of this seems a little forced.

Now for some clarification, Soma decided to cook a disgusting dish for two reasons. One, it properly conveys the type of feelings he felt the day he confronted her. Second is because he is getting lost in the storm. On a subconscious level, he doesn't think he can make a good dish. He has lost his reason to cook, but he won't give up. So, he will cook what he can and that just happens to be disgusting mush. I also did this further heighten the contrast between "love and "hate." I'm using the disgusting food as the symbolic representation of hate, while what Erina makes is the complete opposite.

If any of you have any questions or critiques feel free to PM me on , comment on my story, or message me on reddit mynameisjonas12. Again, thank all of you for reading my story! And I hope I see all of you again within the next month if school does not become unbearable.

Have fun…

-The Ties That Bind Us.


	3. Announcement: State of the Story!

Hey Guys! Wow, it has been a while since I last updated the story. And by gosh has the world gone to crap. From the COVID-19 pandemic to the racial unrest that seems to be rippling throughout the world—2020 has not been kind to anyone. I hope that you and your families have been safe and secure from the brunt of the problems. If not, I hope things will get better soon for you and I will keep all of you in my thoughts.

Now since that's out of the way, let us get down to the nitty-gritty of the story. I had to read the other few chapters many times, because I lost the stories footing. It has become a challenge to recapture the specific vibe and ambiance that I was trying to write around 10 months ago. I'll try my best though. Another problem I had with this particular story is the food. This to me is central to everything in the tale. Since Food Wars (or Shokugeki No Soma) is a food anime/manga, I'm trying to find the perfect dishes for Soma and Erina to create. That has been a hassle, mainly because I do not want the dishes to come across as half-minded or cringe worthy. I want the dishes to be unique and perfectly encapsulate the chef's feelings.

What all of this means is that, I am asking for all of your help! Not to write the story, though any criticisms, suggestions, and judgements are truly appreciated. It makes me a better writer and makes the story exponentially better. So, if you guys can, I'm wondering if you can send me suggestions through reddit—my username is mynameisjonas12—on the dishes the characters should make. My lack of international cuisine knowledge (I'm from the US) is astounding compared to most people. And I do not want my bland food tastes to bleed into the story, so any and all food suggestions would be appreciated.

The last thing on the story front, is when I expect to have the next chapter completed. Considering that I am now on Summer holiday, the amount of time I have to write has exponentially increased. So, I hope to have the next chapter done in 3 weeks. Hopefully sooner and it might be a little later, but 3 weeks is feasibly how long a 10,000-word chapter takes me. Second, if any of you wish to be beta-readers and have a more personal stake in the story, please message me on reddit! Reddit is the easiest way to get ahold of me. I have found that beta-readers increase the quality of the writing and they increase the quality of the world-building by quite a bit. So, please, if any of you guys want to help—don't hesitate to ask!

Finally, I want to reiterate my commitment to try and get the next chapter out by the end of this month or the by first week of July. Again, I hope you all are doing well and are staying safe in these turbulent times. And if you have lost anybody, due to the current state of the world, I offer my sincere condolences.

This will be my only message before the next chapter.

Thankyou,

Thetiesthatbindus

(reddit username: mynameisjonas12)


	4. Resolute pt 1

Resolute Pt. 1

Narrator's POV

Erina did not get back to her hotel room until well after midnight. As she was too busy either pondering her next course of action with Soma or cooking with such fervor that the callouses on her hands began to bleed. Her only recompense was a dreamless sleep, devoid of any of the night terrors that plagued her throughout her youth and into the present.

When Erina awoke, the energy was permeating from her in droves. Her energy all veered in one direction; it was all pointed with a fine tip towards the object of her affections. Soma. A good night's sleep can work wonders on a person's state of mind, especially when they are emotionally exhausted. Yesterday she felt drained like an empty sewage pipe. This is why on this day, Erina's temperament, instead of being inconsolable like she was the day before, was cheery and she was ready to tackle her problems with passion and rationality.

All of that said, this is not to say that Erina did not have strong emotions permeating throughout her, but to say that she was able to put a lid on the bad ones and then put the requisite energy into her goals. Contrarily, Erina was feeling the strongest and happiest emotions that she has ever felt, and she was going to hold onto them as long as she could. This is why, as she stands in front of her hotel room's mirror, inspecting her chef's garbs, the only emotion that a person would grasp is resoluteness.

Erina's POV

The doors slam behind as I make my grand entrance into my kingdom—the kitchen. The Royal Kingdom of Totsuki. I eye over the castle, peering at every little detail. My loyal subjects were all in line and perfect formation. They were waiting for me to give the signal. Sir Spatula, Dame Whisk, Lord Mandoline, and all of the rest, were looking at me with reverent eyes and supplicant souls.

And I wonder why people think I'm crazy?

I mean, obviously I know that these kitchen utensils are in no way sentient nor do I think that they adhere to medieval European honorifics; however, I say it anyway because I do feel like I am the queen of the kitchen. It's a deadly mindset, a mixture of confidence—which other people would call arrogance—and the unique training that my father gave me as a child.

My hand's trace circles and ovals over the cold, steel countertops. My fingers dawdle, absentmindedly, as I go over the mental itinerary that I prepared for the day. The first step to the morning is reflecting on what happened with Soma. I know what occurred and some of his motivations, but I need to reflect on the past.

I like Soma, that's a given now, I can even say that I love him. The problem is that, I am devoid of the social norms and the proper modicum one needs to show their feelings. He gives me the world and I pay him with scorn.

I've known Soma for just over a year and I've hated him for most of it. It was completely irrational hate. Sure, he was kind of annoying and cocky, but he was also passionate and protective.

Not to mention, sexy.

The worst part was that I only started showing him respect after I figured out who his father was. If I were Soma, I would think that I only cared about his father and not him. Which could not be farther from the truth. Sure, I respect his dad, even idolize him. But with Soma, my feeling is way deeper and way more complex.

After all, he was the boy that stood up for her when her dad was destroying her culinary world. He was the boy that threatened his educational needs for me. And he was also the man that I spurned and destroyed with my lack of confidence in him. I vested my trust in Asahi Saiba and now I was paying the price.

My mind takes me back to the first time that I first laid eyes on him, inside Totsuki, which was my gilded cage. If only I knew that he was the key—the one to open up my world to the pleasures and joys of life. He did this with his food and with his personality. Around him, I started to lose my emotional ineptitude. Guilt came to me in droves. Sorrow came to me in packs. I feel tears starting to stream down my face and I quickly dry them up with a napkin, hoping to have stopped their cascade. I have no use crying over spilled milk.

I haven't lost him yet.

My fingers naturally grab the eggs, their weight in my hands calms my nerves. The kitchen brings me peace and solace. If there is one thing I know for certain, it's that Erina and cooking might as well be synonymous. I live for cooking; I am happiest when I'm in the kitchen. This is another thing that Soma and I have in common; the fibers of our beings are dedicated to cooking. He is the street food maestro and I am the fine dining queen. Like the Yin and Yang. Perfectly equal and balanced. Opposite.

'There really is a certain amount of poetry that cooking the Egg Tempura Don would represent—it is the culmination of our relationship and the closing arc of our circle,' I think, 'Hmm, it would also show how much I value his cooking and him.'

My mind went down a slippery slope, in which in the end, I was thinking about a red-haired girl with purple eyes.

'Calm down Erina, keep calm, and don't delve too deep.'

"I'm getting carried and I need to get started" I mutter under my breath. Just thinking about him, makes my heart rate climb up to astronomical numbers and it makes my brain turn into the jelly that is fresh out of the grape press. So, I quickly dispatch the egg and its yok slowly drips into the bowl on the counter. With the whisk in hand, with my heart, mind, and soul in equilibrium, I begin to prepare my first trial dish.

Narrator's POV

'Knock-Knock-Knock'

The heavy pounding comes from the door causing Erina to get to her feet. She rushes straight to the door, knowing that it's her secretary, Hisako. Really, calling here a mere secretary would be a huge disserve. In all honesty, she was Erina's best friend and confidant.

Now, the reason why Hisako needed to be here was that Erina needed her to be the taste-tester. It was imperative for her to try Erina's creations. Hisako does not hold back in critiques nor does she withhold compliments. Those are the hallmarks of a good tester. She also had little tells that clued Erina in on how good the dish truly was.

5 Hours Later

"Ughh, why can't I get this stupid recipe right!" Erina shouts, her cheeks becoming tinted with red. She can remember the complete flavor profile of the dish, including the ingredients, the cooking times, and the special seasonings. But for the life of her, she could not figure out why that dish was so memorable. What was the special thing that made brought the flavor to a new level? In her copy, the toe-curling reaction that made Erina hooked on Soma's cooking was surprisingly absent. This caused her to huff and puff until her cheeks became even pinker.

Quite simply, she felt infuriated. She should be able to make this. Easily.

She thought of herself as the best—others thought of her as the best—and yet, she cannot even make a simple egg dish? She knows that the dish isn't even complicated. Anyone who trained for a month in Totsuki could make this. Yet her she was. Erina knows that there has to be an integral piece of the puzzle that she's lacking. Imperfection and lack of time is a deadly mix. She needed the recipe down and in full force in time for the finals, which were tomorrow night. She does not have any time to waste. She needs the dish to be perfect—now.

But, if there is one thing Erina hates doing, it's asking other people for help. But she was pushed to the edge and she needed answers.

So, with annoyance, Erina picks up her smartphone and dials the number of her idol, Saiba Joichirou. They need to have a conversation about the nature of cooking and this elusive dish.

Joichirou's lithe fingers snake their way to the side of his phone. He cannot stand the constant 'vrr-vrr-vrr' sounds that cause the phone to sputter on the stone countertop. The phone sounds almost like a patient in a hospital, seizing and seizing with no end in sight. His hands move like clockwork to terminate the terrible noise. And as his fingers make the final push towards the button, he notices that the one on the other side is Erina.

His first thought is, 'Okay, never mind, I can't decline the call now. Who knows, this may get interesting too. Alright, time to pick up.' Personally, Joichirou has nothing against Erina; he actually likes her quite a bit. The only thing is she hurt Soma—a lot. On one side, he wanted to be mad at her and on the other side, he felt bad for her. What Erina needed was a tender touch.

"Hello. Hey Erina, have you thought about what I was talking about?"

Joichirou hopes that she has because it is super important for her and his son to get past this. They are both talented chefs and the storm will be coming for both of them. The only way either of them will survive it is by holding onto each other for support and guidance.

All he hears, in a tiny, insecure voice, is: "Yes, of course, sir." The girl sounded so different from her normal tone of arrogance and self-assurance.

'Sir? When the hell did, she starts calling me sir? I'm not her dad. If anything, I'm a chef—not a sir!' Joichirou can sense something is off with Erina.

"Erina is everything alright?" Joichirou asks concern seeping into his tone. He knew for certain now that something was different. He couldn't quite tell if it was a good thing or a bad thing, but something was definitely up.

Erina shouts, "NO!" Her tone of voice belies her previous demeanor.

Her voice nearly instantly reverts back to the soft tone: "I mean, no, I don't think I'm doing so well."

A deafening pause fills both of their ears. Joichirou was not going to speak first, Erina needs to become assertive when it comes to the matters of the heart. He could not hold her hand. He had already led Erina to the oasis and now she needed to drink the water herself.

An audible breath is heard, "Well you see, I have been trying to make the fish dish Soma made me. But I just can't seem to get it right!" Her words come out in a jumble, the sounds tripping over each other, everyone one of them competing to come out first.

Joichirou needs to take his time to comprehend what she said. From what he remembered, she is making the egg in the same way that Soma did and yet, she is not getting the same impact. In all of his years of experience, there is one thing that sticks out as a possible reason. It is a reason that no amount of skill and nor amount of sweat can surmount. This is the power one's emotions have overcooking.

"Ya! I've seen this problem before. It is actually pretty common," Joichirou says with a light chuckle.

"—Really! Oh, thank God!" Erina cuts him off with a newfound fervor and excitement.

"Yep! What you need are emotions and feelings when you cook. Believe me, you're an amazing cook—one of the best. But what Soma lacks in skill, he makes up in passion and purpose. He knows who he's cooking for. He's cooking for you. Cooking for someone you love is what transforms the dish into something truly special. It'll make your food exponentially better"

Joichirou really hoped he was getting through to her.

Erina was hanging onto every word that came out of Joichorou's mouth. Not because he was her idol, though that helped. She listened because of how much sense the words made, it sounded right to her. She found it hard to contain her excitement. Her hands were shaking, and her heartbeat started racing. She was ready to test out this knowledge.

"Okay, I get it now. Umm, thank you. Bye!" She said as if her mouth were moving in warp speed. By the time Joichirou realized what had transpired, the line was already dead. He couldn't help but feel slightly annoyed, after all, he was an adult. However, he also could not help but ultimately feel moved by her utter commitment to his son. Once her feelings were realized in full bloom, her only goal has been to prove her love for Soma.

With there being no more use for it, Joichirou places the phone back onto the stone countertop, his hands working their way back to the bowl in front of him. As his hands start to knead the firm dough, all he can think about is the final of BLUE.

Erina lifted her head up from her hands. After rubbing her eyes to gain sight, she noticed that the whole kitchen seemed different. It was not completely different. To the point, that she did not know where she was. But there definitely was something significantly different.

Then she realized. The kitchen was brighter. The silverware had a shinier luster. The ruby hue of the sapphire flames became more vibrant. The white that surrounded here became more translucent and the black that enclosed her lightened up.

Erina had been born cooking, it would not be inaccurate to say that she came cooking out of the womb. And yet she never knew true cooking. She never saw true beauty. Don't get it wrong, Erina knows how to cook—the lifeless, stale, great dishes. But this was different. Erina was cooking for someone that she truly cared about and had in her mind. Before, she cooked either for the judge's sake or for her sake. It was passionless. This was the opposite she was cooking for someone she loved, someone who needed to feel the emotions she wanted to communicate. Food was the perfect vessel for her emotions.

'Two days, two revelations must be a new personal record,' Erina muses to herself. Who would have thought? Just one day before, she finally accepted her feelings for Soma allowing for a whole new level of feels. And now, today, she finally learns what makes a great chef tick and how Soma cooks for her. She felt as though she was on cloud nine and she never wanted to come down.

When she finally finished her dish using the newfound advice, she gained from Joichirou, she finally received the reaction that she had been craving. One of pure delight, devoid of the guttural and lustful cries of a foodgasm. Hisako had a look as though she just made it to heaven, and it was even better than advertised. The tears started from the corners of Hisako's eyes.

Normally, if Hisako cries after eating Erina's food, it is because it is fueled by ecstasy. Hisako's senses are overloaded, and the only way she can express herself is through tears. It is a lot easier to do this because it takes no nuance. However, after eating this dish, Hisako's tears were not out of control. They came out in a slow, drawn-out fashion, slowly creeping towards the zenith. She was able to eat the food and savor every bite, instead of wolfing down and then realizing that there was no more. Instead of instant gratification, there was work that you had to put into it, which made it savorier. And when the response hits its peak, the tears begin to freefall. Tears of palpable emotion—love, happiness, friendship—not mindless tears of ecstasy.

Hisako only had the energy to ask one question. Which she asked, in between breaths, "Erina, what did you do? What did you learn?"

There were only two words that can adequately represent what Erina did. She learned how to truly cook. Gone was the passionless, precision chef. She was now dynamic and ready to show Soma and BLUE what she learned.


End file.
